flotsom jetsom

flotsom jetsom, originally uploaded by kaliji.

One of those pages I had given up on in frustration and decided to revamp with some found crappola, new and from the stash. Transforming pages such as these is a good exercise when attempting to launch oneself back into the creative milieu. Since you already gave up on those pages in a sense, you don't worry about the results like you would with an entirely new page. I also foundreally like the idea of using old notes from classes I've taken for background fodder and selectively letting words peer through the paint.

The kitty cats (I affectionately call them boobie faces) would like recognition for their contributions, they were "helping out" while I was taking the pictures of my journal by laying in front of the pages and playing musical chairs.

Sensi

Anais/Anna Bear/Slut Muffin

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mandala.

mandala., originally uploaded by kaliji.

"The earth is a living Mandala--a structural matrix through and from which flow a succession of changes, elemental forms, and primal urges, each surpassing the other in an infinite variety of organic structures and impulses, crowned by the supreme attribute of reflective consciousness. It's flow, though working through a relatively well-defined structure, is subject to the infinite processes of growth and transformation by virtue of the ever-changing relationships both internal and external to its basic structure." --Mandala

Contour Party On-The-Go.

contour #1., originally uploaded by kaliji.

okey.

contour #2., originally uploaded by kaliji.

dokey.

contour #3., originally uploaded by kaliji.

artickokey.

Notepad + sharpies + a human (or representations of a human) = portable fun.
I do these at work, in class, between classes, at coffee shops with Agent Pineapple. We are each trying to complete a notepad with contours of each other; we have quite a ways to go but projects make the mundane bearable. Not to mention, the results are often hilarious.

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Saying Yes to September.

Come August I become consumed with tunnel vision fixed upon yet another fall semester at community college, still wading in life possibilities. It feels much like drowning in the amorphous rainbow that is a McDonald's ball pit with nothing substantial to latch onto for the sake of self-preservation.

I noticed that once engulfed in the clamor of The First Day I become hyper-aware of the social dynamics my peers prescribe to. We are lonely souls ricocheting off one another in the search for a tribe, a cult, a gang to call our own--any connection substantial enough to transcend the collective memory of social networking sites into something more concrete. Something accompanied with nicknames concerning canned food items, spirit animals, or sexually explicit catch-phrases. Something which includes forcing nicotine in and expelling it out of our lungs in one shared self-destructive, self-aware breath. Something which has everything to do with quantity and nothing to do with quality. The more bodies you can claim as your friends the better. Resigned to this being a necessary and unavoidable aspect of my social development, I realize that I need to open up, reach out, and connect with individuals my age. It is too easy to withdraw, to burrow oneself deeper into that proverbial ball pit and spend your precious free time watching every Gilmore Girls episode you own (which would be seasons one through five--the good ones). Or maybe that's just me ;)

In September I want to focus. Focus on academics and a few goals that are within my capabilities to make tangible such as creating a space that Agent Pineapple and I want to be in as opposed to just sleep in. A space where creativity, academia, and relaxation can flower. This means consciously filling the well; it is imperative to keep the well half-full by default, to focus on the bigger picture and grasping at anything to keep it saturated with soul water.

Therefore today I have been spending my precious hours of "Lara time" organizing, musing about art, listening to the mix-CD my sister gave me, and playing dress-up: all well-filling activities in their own right. I am breathing. It has been so long that I was worried that my body forgot how.

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Shiny pom-pom!

shiny pom-pom, originally uploaded by kaliji.

For Self Portrait Tuesday; theme: Shine.

This little gold pom-pom pounced on me on my way to work and I just couldn't resist it. I bounced it in my hand and rubbed it between my fingers the rest of the way, mesmerized. It is a magical worry stone; I'm glad it found me :)

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sunflowers.

sunflowers., originally uploaded by kaliji.

happy happy happy.

i forgot where i was going with this.

my lovely brought me sunflowers.

they make me giddy and smiley

and look perfect on my altar in

the happy mocha chai bottle

that i knew would be of use

one day

♥

Gratuitous mirror self portraits.

gratuitous mirror self portrait, originally uploaded by kaliji.

another gratuitous mirror self portrait., originally uploaded by kaliji.

adding to the chaos., originally uploaded by kaliji.

It's not my fault that my old neighborhood has amazing public washrooms. I just noticed how when I take pictures my pinky is in full salute, that's embarrassing. The digit becomes erect when I hold coffee cups too, and with other beverages on occasion. Fortunately the problem can be circumvented by using a straw; they should make straws for hot beverages. That doesn't solve the picture-taking problem though.